Nothing is more nerve-wracking than having other people read your writing, but alas, this is what we are working for as writers. While getting my novel ready for publication, I have read it to my husband (out loud, you know, because it wasn’t stress-inducing enough already) and sent it off to the most reliable of English, grammar, and storytelling aficionados in my life. Their one mission: to pick my story apart.

Excuse me a moment while I do some deep breathing with my head between my legs… Okay, I’m good. Where was I? Oh, yes.

When it comes to self-publishing, or even finding an agent if you are going the traditional route, you need to make sure your story is air-tight, not full of holes like delicious swiss cheese. Unfortunately, as much as we would like to believe we are capable of finding every little plot hole, character inconsistency, and wrong word usage, our brains just can’t do it. Don’t ask me how, there’s some science-y and/or psychological reason for this. And as much as you believed your mama every time she told you you were special, in this situation, you ain’t.

This is why, before we put our writing out into the world to speak for itself, we need to find people we can trust to read over our work and give us constructive feedback and point out anything we missed. It’s hard, but we’ve got to do it.

In the meantime, find ways to distract yourself. For me, I am moving onto the next writing project and getting into other hobbies and activities so I can put the work that other people are reading out of my mind. Do whatever helps you to destress and feel good about yourself.

And remember: just because someone doesn’t like your work or there are a lot of corrections to be made that doesn’t mean you are a terrible writer or you should give up writing altogether. Think of this as a great opportunity for growth and to learn more about yourself as a writer and the craft of writing as a whole. Nothing truly bad can happen from other people reading your book or other writing project, even though you may have to burn this idea into your mind by saying it a hundred times a day.